Challenging myself as a SAHM and The Day Zero Project

It doesn't really kick in until January, but I am now officially a stay-at-home-Mum. I know that it's the right thing for me, and I'm incredibly lucky to be able to stay at home with the children. But that doesn't mean that I'm not going to find it difficult. I was browsing through StumbleUpon the other night (it's brilliant!) and I came across this website Suburban CEO. I read many things here that really struck a chord with me.

In particular, I was very taken with this chart showing how the life of a stay at home mother has changed over the last century or so, and why women staying at home with children can now find it very difficult. The website then goes on to talk about the five things that are missing in modern life, and how we can replace those missing pieces - community, goals, support, money and leadership. Even if you are a Mum that doesn't stay at home full-time with the children I'd really recommend visiting the site. It doesn't take long to read through and get the gist of it, and I think that it is relevant to everyone. I certainly experienced the same issues when I was working part-time.

One of the most important recommendations on the site is having projects, in particular short term projects - a goal that can be achieved within three months. I really like the idea of setting out some things that I would like to challenge myself to achieve, and being able to tick them off when they are done with a sense of accomplishment. This idea reminded me of something else that I had read about - The Day Zero Project. This is a self-created list of 101 challenges to be completed within 1001 days.

So I am combining ideas that I have picked up from both these websites, and I have set up my very own list of 101 Things in 1001 Days. Bearing in mind that overseas travel to exotic destinations is probably out for the next few years, all of my goals are very simple and should be easily achievable if I just get on with them. Some go back to interests that I had before children, and some are things that will help me to be more organised in the future. Some are things for myself, some are for me and the children, some are for me and my husband and some are for our whole family. Some will take a few minutes to complete and some will take a lot longer. There will certainly be no excuse for sitting around on an evening and thinking that I have nothing to do!

You can see my list here 101 Things in 1001 Days, and I'm going to create a page on the blog to track my progress. I'm really motivated to complete the list so I'll see how I go - I have until the 20th August 2015!

Have you started the Day Zero Project? I'd love to know what you think about the idea!

An ending, and a beginning

Today marks the start of a new role in life - as a full-time, stay at home Mum. After being back at work for a whole month I was placed at risk of redundancy, and the whole long, drawn-out process, which could have seen me found another job at any time up until 5pm on my leaving day, has finally come to an end and I have now officially been made redundant.

I'm not really cross about it. I fully appreciate that my work had dried up, and the fact that I had taken a full year's maternity leave twice without any cover shows that I was hardly indispensible. Mainly I'm just a bit sad, it was my first proper job out of university, I'd been working in the same team for nine years, and I'd built up some strong friendships. I'm really going to miss the social aspect.

Fortunately we are in a position financially that means I can stay at home for a bit, and now that everything has finally been confirmed I'm able to concentrate on the positives. I had some wobbles about returning to work, and I am thrilled that I'm going to be able to spend more time with the little ones. Harry will move to a pre-school closer to home for a few sessions a week as we prepare for him to start school next September, and Mia will be at home with me all the time for now. I sometimes feel that Mia can be pushed to one side as Harry can be so demanding, so it will be lovely to have some time to spend just the two of us.

Here's to a new chapter!

Back to work

I have completed my first week back at work. Circumstances meant that I had to work an extra day this week, so it has been tiring, although in a different way to that of looking after two little ones all week. 

I’ve found the transition more difficult this time. Perhaps because I’ve enjoyed the entire year of maternity leave a lot more than I did the first one. Mia has seemed an easier baby, and I’ve also really appreciated the extra time that I’ve had to spend with Harry. Things have changed a bit at work while I’ve been away, but I have settled in, moved in my jar of Marmite, my hot chocolate and cardigan, and claimed my space with framed photos and postcards. 

In order to fit in my hours I need to start very early in the morning, so two mornings a week Ram will be responsible for breakfasting and dressing both little ones and delivering them to their nursery. When I went to collect them on Monday, two of the staff took great delight in telling me that Harry had come in with his trousers on backwards because Daddy had dressed him that morning. 

It does feel as though the house has rather descended into chaos without me being there throughout the day. The washing is piling up, the dishwasher is full, and my kitchen counters are barely visible underneath piles of clutter. Luckily yesterday my parents were on duty, and so my Mum gave the kitchen a bit of a clean and tidied up some of the toys. 

I am going to miss the activities that we used to do, and there won’t be as much time for crafting or playing (not to mention blogging!). But hopefully it will make the time that I do have at home more precious, and it will also do me good to have a break and enjoy some adult conversation.

So here’s to a new chapter!

Preparing for the return to work

So in less than two weeks my maternity leave will be over. In fact technically it already is, I'm now using up the annual leave which I accrued while I was off. I'm very lucky that I am able to work part-time, and with a combination of a flexible employer, my wonderful parents, my lovely husband and a conveniently located nursery we are able to work out a mixture of childcare which we are happy with.

After my first bout of maternity leave with Harry I was ready to go back to work. He was a grumpy baby, and to be honest I didn't mind the break. I just enjoyed being able to sit at my desk without being disturbed, and to have a lunchbreak in which I could eat my sandwiches quietly and check the news headlines on the computer. This time though, I'm finding the prospect of returning to work more difficult. Perhaps my feelings have something to do with the fact that I don't see another year of maternity leave on the horizon...

Mia has had her first full day at nursery, and while of course it is going to take a few weeks for her to settle fully I'm happy with the care and attention that she will receive. She'll also have the benefit of extra time to spend with my husband and my parents. My first few weeks back at work are going to be a bit of a struggle as we get to know our new routine, in particular the mornings where I will be starting work early and my husband needs to get both little ones up, dressed and breakfasted before going to work himself.

I'll still have two and a half days a week at home with both children, and from experience when I had the same with Harry this is a nice amount of time to fill, and doesn't make the week seem like one endless long afternoon. My days off are in the middle of the week too, which breaks things up nicely, and I hope that our time together will be better spent as I make the effort to do fun things.

I do have a few things to get ready before going back to work. I've chosen the photographs to display on my desk and I've sorted out my handbag (not a spare nappy or baby wipe in sight!). Now I'm hoping to spend the next couple of weeks on a bit of a detox so that I can button up my smart trousers comfortably!

The grinning faces that will light up my desk!